Wednesday, March 18, 2009,12:06 AM

It's day 4.


I just wished I had no one to account for my actions, but I really don't wanna screw up what I've built up and brought so far.


Weird people throwing glances, familiar smiley faces.


It's not easy.


Yet the idea of the huge mystery makes me all the more fascinated. I guess that's just my nature, has been and will always be, from what I know now at least. Meeting up with my friends, I never knew I could be that conversable and resourceful.


I've changed.


I know it when I look into the mirror and see my bright eyes as compared to '02. The introverted loner faded into the future. I remember how much I told Gwen not to change and the stubborn me who held on to the past so dearly. Now, I don't know which one is better. Sentimental or Carefree.


Beaming. Talking. Joking. Laughing. Grinning. Accomodating.


What was it that made me the me I am now.


The memories, the people, the events. Miracles, accidents or catastrophes. Books and books of words can never match the real situation. Now all that's left is my imagination. Trust can not match my own memories and words, of which nearly all of them are conflicting.


All the more confusing.


Maybe I should stop referring, and explore the past all over again, this time, from a whole new personality.

nat*Rockin